Some Examples of Tom Swifties

A Tom swifty is a one-line play on words involving a punning relationship between the way an adverb describes the action of a speaker and the content of the speaker's statement. Tom Swift was the brainchild of Edward L. Stratemeyer (1862-1930). Stratemeyer first used the name "Tom Swift" in 1894, for the title character in "Shorthand Tom" and in 1910 re-used the name for a new character, an ingenious youth whose amazing scientific inventions and discoveries would carry him to weird and wonderful places. The "Adventures of Tom Swift" series, was published under the pseudonym Victor Appleton. He also created the Bobbsey Twins, Nancy Drew, the Hardy Boys, and other lesser-known series. Stratemeyer only supplied the characters and the (repetitive) plots for his books; he had a syndicate of some 20 hack writers to do the actual writing.

"I'm an ordained minister," said Tom reverently.

"        ," said Tom blankly.

" ..., and you lose a few," said Tom winsomely.

"I've struck oil," Tom said, crudely.

"Give me some more macaroni and cheese, and I'll tell you," said Tom craftily.

"I forgot what to buy," Tom said listlessly.

"I brought the dessert," said Tom piously.

"That's the third time my teacher changed my grade," Tom remarked.

"Parsley, sage, rosemary," said Tom timelessly.

"I need a home run hitter," Tom said ruthlessly.

"I need a pencil sharpener," said Tom bluntly.

"I only get Newsweek," said Tom timelessly.

"The prisoner escaped by climbing down a rope," said Tom condescendingly.

"Since in this statement 'Y = COSH(X)', X is invariant, let's pre-compute Y before we enter the loop," said Tom precociously.

"I'm in the process of documenting my BASIC program," Tom remarked.

"I'm rereading the second Gospel," Tom remarked.

"Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays I think I'm a wigwam; Tuesdays, Thursdays, and weekends I think I'm a teepee," said Tom too tensely.

"I think I'll use a different font," said Tom boldly.

"I want to date around," said Tom unsteadily.

"I was adopted," said Tom transparently.

"I won the daily double," Tom cried hoarsely.

"Hey, Vern! Knowhutimean?" Tom said earnestly.

"Elvis is dead," said Tom expressly.

"What's a wide-angle lens?" asked Tom obtusely.

"I don't like hot dogs," Tom said frankly.

"I'll try and dig it up for you," Tom said gravely.

"I'm back from my lobotomy," said Tom absentmindedly.

"It's the maid's night off," said Tom helplessly.

"Let's get married," said Tom engagingly.

"Look at those newborn kittens," said Tom literally.

"My pencil is dull," said Tom pointlessly.

"My stereo's half-fixed," said Tom monotonously.

"I've had my left and right ventricles removed," Tom said half-heartedly.